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Chris Griffin
Christopher Cross "Chris" Griffin is the middle child of the Griffin family. Personality Though Chris is not the brightest one in the family, he is particularly coherent and makes a good point when talking about movies. Chris deals with the problems that most pubescent boys face: acne, girls, and school. He is 14 years old and is enrolled at James Woods Regional High School. Chris has been known to feel self-conscious about himself, especially his weight. In fact, on the Volume 1 DVD Boxset, it stated that Chris "wouldn't hurt a fly, unless it landed on his hot dog".He was referred to as an "Elephant Child" when he was born. Chris is also willing to do something as drastic as to convert to Judaism order to do better in school, specifically math. He once believed his low grades in mathematics were caused by himself when he tickled his brain by sticking an army man's rifle into his nose and accidentally puncturing a lobe. Chris enjoys drawing and once almost managed to become a famous artist in New York, but failed. Chris also has an apparent physical attraction to his mother, Lois, which was noted in the commentary of Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story. It is also seen in E. Peterbus Unum (where he hands Meg a note that reads "I think Mrs. Griffin is hot") and in Model Misbehavior (where he says that he'll masturbate to pictures of her).Chris - like his father - is obese, has a low IQ and no common sense; however in the episode Fast Times at Buddy Cianci Jr. High Brian refers to Chris's class as intelligent before going to teach remedial English.2 Also, various storylines give him autistic savant talents, such as artistic ability,34 and detailed knowledge of film and TV actors. Occasionally he exhibits unexpected, uncharacteristic insights, such as when he gives Peter and Lois a detailed and articulate lecture on the effects and disadvantages of marijuana.5 Chris is usually depicted as naive to the point of blamelessness. However, when Peter and Lois were having a fist fight, Chris cheered for Peter, telling him to "kick her ass!" Also, in Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story, when Lois and Peter are trying to make out, the children mistake it for a fight and Chris says "I don't know what they're fighting about, but I think Dad's winning. Go Dad!" In a running gag, Chris is regularly tormented by an evil monkey who lives in his closet but has recently slowed down a bit. In "Emission Impossible", it is revealed that Chris was born as an accident, due to a broken condom. As a result, Peter and Lois filed a lawsuit against the company and bought the house they currently live in. In "Peter's Daughter", Lois revealed that she smoked and drank a lot when she was pregnant with Chris to try and incite a miscarriage, but chickened out halfway through the pregnancy. This may be the explanation for Chris' stupidity and other anomalies. Also, it is known that Chris possesses an abnormally large penis. While Chris is better treated than Meg, he is usually more subjected to Peter's thoughtlessness, since Peter frequently neglects Chris in favor of other children or himself, and often accuses Chris of being "needy." Unlike Peter, Chris also doesn't seem to dislike Meg as much, merely having a rather extreme sibling-rivalry relationship. Chris is generally mild-mannered and friendly, but is often rude to others when angered, such as in "Long John Peter", when he both insulted Joe Swanson for his handicapped status, and hit Brian with a chair just to go back to the vet and see a girl who broke up with him. Another example was in "Movin' Out (Brian's Song)", when Brian just came back after being dumped by Jillian, and for no reason, Chris said, "Welcome home, asshole!" (in the Fox and syndicated airings, he says "Welcome back, douchebag!"). In the Season 3 episode "When You Wish Upon a Weinstein", Chris almost converted to Judaism after Peter told him that Jews are smarter and more successful. Lois came to Chris's bar mitzvah to end the conversion, and a crowd of angry Jews chased after them. Also in Season 3, it is revealed by Brian that Chris' favourite Ice cream flavour was Chocolate Chip. =Sexuality= While possessing incomplete-at-best sexual knowledge—in "Love Thy Trophy" Chris is convinced babies come from the Child Welfare Office—Chris in several episodes demonstrates a compelling interest in girls. In "To Love and Die in Dixie" Chris shows a romantic interest in a girl named Barbara. Later in the episode when he and his family are exiled to the South, he meets and befriends a person named Sam, who later kisses him despite being a boy. Confused about the kiss (and even saying it felt good), he confronts Sam, who's really revealed to be a girl dressed in guy clothes. After talking to Sam, Chris feels opened enough to express his feelings for her. He felt nervous about talking to her, she suggested to him that he should pretend she was a male, and Chris happily agrees to making out (raising more questions about his sexuality). Even though they kiss at the end of the episode, their relationship wasn't established afterwards when he and his family returned home. In "You May Now Kiss the...Uh...Guy Who Receives", he is attracted to a student named Alyssa, who is a young Republican; Chris becomes a Young Republican because Alyssa offers to let him touch her breasts (although he is not at first sure that's "something he wants"). He is often harassed by his pedophile neighbor Herbert. In "Jungle Love", Chris runs away to South America to escape the bullying at school and joins the Peace Corps. He gets the entire tribe, whom he's staying with, to dance. By doing this Chris married the Chief's daughter, Loka. Their marital status has not been mentioned in any subsequent episodes. In "Long John Peter" Chris falls in love with a vet intern named Anna, who he asks out. Their relationship goes well until Chris (with Peter's advice) puts her down on a date to make progress, but Anna breaks up with him instead. At the end of the episode, they kiss and get back together. In "Running Mates", "E. Peterbus Unum", and "Model Misbehavior", Chris describes his mother Lois as sexually attractive. Chris also comments openly about masturbation in several gags in the episodes "Running Mates", "The Fat Guy Strangler" and "Barely Legal". Ironically, in "Holy Crap", grandfather Francis Griffin accuses Chris of masturbating when he was really just defecating by telling him that was he was doing in the bathroom was morally wrong and God can see it. He spends the rest of the episode holding in his waste (unaware that Francis thought he was masturbating) until Peter lets him "defy" his grandfather. In the episode "And the Wiener Is..." it is discovered that Chris has a bigger penis than Peter. When Chris and Peter are in a sauna, Peter asks Chris whats wrong with his leg, only to figure out himself and say "Oh my God that's not your leg!" Chris is known to masturbate on Thursdays, according to the episode "Barely Legal." =Fears= He is tormented by the Evil Monkey that lives in his closet. He is also in the habit of fearing seniors due to their history of paddling him. He even has nightmares of how Meg killed his other sister. =Quotes= "I'm turning you into poo!" "Oh no! Someone peed in my pants!" "Ha ha dad called you fat" (pause) "Wait..." "Mom, I'm afraid if I fall asleep, the hurricane's gonna sneak up on me and give me a vasectomy." "I'm so hungry I could ride a horse (pause) I don't get it, well I guess I can ride it to the store" "...The evil monkey who lives in my closet will come get me!" =Relatives= Main Article: List of Griffin and Pewterschmidt ancestors *Peter Griffin (father) *Lois Griffin (mother) *Stewie Griffin (brother) *Meg Griffin (sister) *Mickey McFinnigan (paternal grandfather) *Thelma Griffin (paternal grandmother) *Carter Pewterschmidt (maternal grandfather) *Barbara Pewterschmidt (maternal grandmother) *Peter Griffin Jr. (desceased brother) Griffin, Chris Griffin, Chris